Friday, September 18, 2009

Shampoo for the Family Jewels..No Lie



Eier Shampoo has got to be one of the most bizarre body-hygiene products on the market right now. It’s used to clean men’s testicles.
If there’s one thing Germans do well (except making great cars and tasty beer) is clean their balls. They’re so preoccupied with keeping them as clean as possible that they’ve actually come up with a testicle-cleaning shampoo. It’s called Eier and you can actually buy it from a German online store, for only 5 euros. Come guys, your balls have to be worth at least that, right?



the Word for friday

COULROPHOBIA


An irrational fear of clowns.


What, fear those delightful purveyors of slapstick comedy? One may as well go in terror of Santa Claus (but then a few people do that too, sad cases of Santa Claustrophobia). But clown humour has always embraced cruelty in its teasing and insulting of other clowns and members of the audience. Clowns represent anarchy, the personifications of unreason, and a force of nature out of control. Who knows what really lies behind their unchanging painted faces and outlandish costumes? These are all good enough reasons for even the strongest and most adult of us to feel unease in the presence of a clown. Some children are terrified by them and a surprisingly large proportion of adults confess to finding them creepy and disturbing, so much so that this word for their condition has had to be invented. It’s not old — perhaps from the 1980s — and has been taken from Greek kolon, a limb, which seems strange until you find the related kolobathristes was a stilt-walker. This seems to have been the nearest its coiner could get to a suitable classical allusion, since ancient Greek didn’t have a word for a clown in our modern sense.

Mexican Lion Discourages Thieves

This is a true story of a Garage Owner in the Southwest.
(New Mexico)

He was sick and tired of thugs breaking into his garage shop to steal tools etc. So he came up with this idea. He put the word out that he had a new Mexican Lion that would attack anyone that would break in or climb his fence. Would be thieves saw the "Lion" from a distance and fled the scene.






Mule Killed Mountain Lion? Not Really..


These pictures and the story about the lion-killing-mule circulated for quite a while on the Internet before Steven Richards got the real story and published it in Western Mule Magazine. The mule's name is Berry and it belongs to 25-year old Jody Anglin from New Mexico. Anglin says he enjoys hunting mountain lions and is usually accompanied by a cadre of hunting dogs. In 1998 he got Berry to assist with the lion hunts. On the first hunt, Berry was attracted to the carcass of a lion that Anglin had shot and sort of nuzzled it and nibbled at it. With each new kill, however, Berry got more animated and couldn't wait to get to the dead lions. The pictures in the eRumor were taken in 2002 or 2003 and show Berry toying with a lion that was already dead, not killing it. Someone along the way created the story about the Montana couple, the stalking lion, and the fanciful descriptions of the pictures.










these things I ponder..i am somewhat ponderosa i guess

falling rock zone

Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.

All those who believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.

I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.

OK, so what's the speed of dark?

Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.

Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.

Many people quit looking for work when they find a job.

I intend to live forever - so far, so good.

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

24 hours in a day... 24 beers in a case... coincidence?

When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

I used to have an open mind but my brains kept falling out.

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.

Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

For every action, there is an equal and opposite criticism.

No one is listening until you make a mistake.

Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.

The colder the X-ray table, the more of your body is required to be on it.

The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.

The severity of the itch is proportional to the reach.

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism, to steal from many is research.

The problem with the gene pool is that there is no lifeguard.

The sooner you fall behind, the more time you'll have to catch up.

A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.

If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried before.

A fool and his money are soon partying.

Plan to be spontaneous tomorrow.

If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.

Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route.

I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.

Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.

Borrow money from pessimists, they don't expect it back.

Half the people you know are below average.

99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.

42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

a Blond Joke for Don*

Seven-Hundred-Ten:

A few days ago I was having some work done at the local auto dealership. A blonde came in and asked for a seven-hundred-ten.

We all looked at each other and another customer asked, "What is a seven-hundred-ten?"

She replied, "You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it and need a new one." She said that she did not know what it was but this piece had always been there.

He gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like. She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710. He then took her over to another car, which had its hood up and asked, "Is there a 710 on this car?"

She pointed and said, "Of course, it's right there!"

Photobucket

the joke for Friday

I pulled into the crowded parking lot at the Super Wal-Mart Shopping Center and rolled down the car windows to make sure my Golden Retriever pup had fresh air.
She was stretched full-out on the back seat and I wanted to impress upon her that she must remain there.
I walked to the curb backward, pointing my finger at the car and saying emphatically, 'Now you stay. Do you hear me?'
"Stay Stay"



The driver of a nearby car, a pretty blonde young lady, gave me a strange look and said,



Why don't you just put it in "PARK"? !!!!!
this joke comes from my wonderful friend Rock 'n Roll..thank Diane!

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