Wednesday, August 11, 2010

JOKE: Hi, I'm Chuck

This guy has four daughters who all live at home. One Friday night the doorbell rings. The guy answers it, and a kid standing there says "Hi, I'm Freddy. I'm here to pick up Betty. We're gonna go eat spaghetti. Is she ready?" The man, mildly amused, calls down his daughter, and the two leave.

A few minutes later the doorbell rings again and he answers. A kid standing there says "Hi, I'm Jim. I'm here to see Kim. We're gonna go for a swim. Can I come in?" The guy, now perplexed, says yes, and the two take off.

A few minutes later, the doorbell rings and again the father answers. A kid standing there says "Hi, I'm Joe. I'm here to pick up Flo. We're gonna go to the show. Can she go?" The man, now kind of annoyed says yes and the two depart.

Sure enough, a few minutes later the doorbell rings once again, and the father answers. A kid standing there says "Hi, I'm Chuck.."
The father shot him.

hahahaha

WOW ..SHE IS ONLY 10 ???? AMAZING VOICE

Man tries to get his name legally changed to Boomer the Dog

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Gary Guy Mathews displays his dog collar as he leaves court on Tuesday, where he was seeking to have his name legally changed to Boomer the Dog.

Preparing for his day in court, Gary Guy Mathews took off his red dog collar and left his squeaky toy at home. It is now up to a judge whether he will wake up one day as Boomer the Dog and find his furry dreams come true.

The sight of "furries" dressed in animal costumes has become commonplace in Pittsburgh, which for five summers has hosted Anthrocon, the largest annual convention of the anthropomorphic enthusiasts. But it is exceedingly rare -- even among a group committed to attributing human characteristics to animals -- to legally change one's name to that of a made-up dog.

Meet Mr. Mathews, a barking trailblazer.

When he was a teen, the now 44-year-old Green Tree man became obsessed with a short-lived NBC show called "Here's Boomer," about a stray mutt that saved people in trouble. In high school other kids began to call him Boomer and he broadcast a radio show about the dog from his basement. By adulthood he was dressing as the shaggy-haired dog at conventions and parties, for the last few years in a full-sized Boomer suit made of shredded paper.

Early this year he began the process of legally changing his name to Boomer The Dog, noting many of his friends already called him that: one of his exhibits in a hearing Tuesday before Allegheny County Common Pleas Court Judge Robert W. Folino was a letter addressed to his adopted name from a friend named Hobnose Bordercollie.

His own father, Guy Mathews, had legally changed his name from Orlando Matteucci, he told the judge. (He eventually got his late parents to call him Boomer, too, but it wasn't easy. Life as a furry "is good and it's bad. It's hard to get people in your life to adjust," he said in an interview.)

After years of thinking about the name change, Mr. Mathews, who is single, began the legal process early this year, which included getting his fingerprints checked through a state police criminal records database. "It took some time to work up the nerve. I treated it like a science project," he said. He filed for the name change in June.

Judge Folino questioned Mr. Mathews on if he might just change his first name to Boomer and if he has been paid to perform as the dog. (The unemployed computer technician said he had not been paid, "but it would be nice if I would be.")

The judge said he would issue a ruling in a couple days, saying he might rule against the name if it "causes confusion in the community" or raises the "likelihood of unintended consequences," such as being "seen as bizarre."

Dr. Samuel Conway, the CEO of Anthrocon, said he knew of only two others in furry fandom who had legally changed their names out of the several thousand involved in the movement.

"I do not believe it is any more common among our number than one would find in the rest of society, where people are often driven to change their names out of religious fervor, a sense of cultural identity, or other reason of personal interest," he said in an e-mail.

"I wish Mr. the Dog luck in his pursuit, with the earnest hope that he has chosen a career path for which such a monicker would be of benefit."

laffing chimp,laffing,LOL,

LOL Milk Makes You Strong

Man faked seizures to get out of restaurant tabs

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City prosecutors say that for three months, 43-year-old Andrew Palmer dined and drank at city restaurants but never paid a tab - by faking seizures.

Palmer, of the 500 block of South Broadway pleaded guilty to one count of theft scheme on Aug. 3 and received 18 months in jail, the maximum sentence.

Prosecutors say Palmer dined at restaurants including Capital Grille, Burke's Cafe, Ding How Restaurant, Maisy's Restaurant, and Borinken Bar and Restaurant between April 26 and July 21. In each case, he feigned a seizure requiring the presence of medical personnel.

We're working to get the court file to figure out just how investigators caught on to the scheme. But these were hardly Palmer's first offenses - in fact, I'm not sure I've seen a criminal record quite this long.

According to the Maryland judiciary case search web site, Palmer has been charged with theft or other crimes an astounding 89 times, with at least 34 convictions, in jurisdictions including Baltimore City, Baltimore County, Prince George's County, Anne Arundel and St. Mary's.

And among those charges is "eating in a public place without paying" and "refusing to pay taxi cab fare." Almost all of the cases were for theft under $100, and when convicted he received jail stints of 90 days. His most serious crimes were committed in the early 1990s, when he was convicted of arson and later was sentenced to five years for robbery in Anne Arundel County.

It's a Mouse... It's a Deer... It's a Mouse Deer!

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A tiny deer at Paignton Zoo has given birth just months after she lay critically ill on the operating table. A long and complicated illness required the tiny lesser Malay mouse deer to undergo multiple rounds of general anaesthesia and surgery. Due to the hard work of zoo vets and a little luck, the tiny deer overcame it's illness and on June 19th gave birth to an even tinier little fawn. Mouse deer are the smallest members of the animal family that includes pigs, hippos, camels, deer, antelopes, sheep and goats. Adults are 45 to 55 centimetres long (18 to 22 inches) and can live for about 12 years.
Devon,UK.

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