VIDEO: RAT AND CAT..BUDDIES

VIDEO: Willie the Raccoon's Birthday

JOKE: Her physician recommended Dr. Wang, a well-known Chinese sex therapist

Her personal physician recommended Dr. Wang, a well-known Chinese sex therapist. So she went and saw him. Upon entering the examination room, Dr. Wang took one look at her and said, "okay, take off aw your crows."   She quickly disrobed and stood naked before him.   "Now, " said Dr. Wang, "get dow on knees and craw reery, reery, fass away from me to the other side of room."   Having done that Dr. Wang said, "okay, now turn around and craw reery, reery fass to me." Once again she obliged.   Dr. Wang slowly shook his head, "okay, your probrem vaywe, vaywe bad, you have Ed Zachary Disease.....worse case I ever see....that why you not have dates."   Confused, the woman asked, "What is Ed Zachary Disease?"   Dr. Wang replied, "It when your face rook Ed Zachary rike your ass." 

JOKE: why did you shoot your wife and not her lover?

"So let me get this straight," the prosecutor says to the defendant, "you came home from work early and found your wife in bed with a strange man."

"That's correct," says the defendant.

"Upon which," continues the prosecutor, "you take out a pistol and shoot your wife, killing her."

"That's correct," says the defendant.

"Then my question to you is, why did you shoot your wife and not her lover," asked the prosecutor?

The defendant replies, "It was easier than having to shoot a different man everyday!"

GOT CAPTION?

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Mother, 66, gives birth to triplets

 

Bhateri Devi, the world’s oldest mother of triplets, with her two sons and daughter at an IVF clinic in northern India.

After being childless for 44 years of marriage Bhateri Devi gave birth to two boys and a girl. ‘Bhateri has fulfilled my dream of having a child and gave my family an heir,’ said husband Deva Singh, 64.

‘She was my first wife and after she failed to conceive a child, I married twice – but again I did not have any children from my other wives either.’

Devi, from Madina in Rohtak, northern India, was given IVF treatment at the National Fertility Centre in Hisar.

It is the same clinic where Rajo Devi Lohan, the world’s oldest mother, was controversially treated, aged 70.

‘Bhateri Devi was coming to us for the treatment. She has become a mother for the first time and conceived only in our third attempt through IVF technique,’ said Dr Anurag Bishnoi.

The triplets, weighing 1.1kg (2lbs 6oz), 1kg (2lbs 4oz) and 0.7kg (1lb 7oz), are dangerously underweight and are being treated in intensive care.

They were born by Caesarean section on May 29.

‘I will provide all the best facilities for my children in the coming years,’ promised Mr Singh.

 

JOKE:

Cowardly bullfighter arrested for fleeing bullring

A Mexican matador was arrested for breaching his contract after losing his nerve and running from the bullring. Terrified Christian Hernandez dropped his red cape and ran from the charging bull during an event at the Plaza Mexico in Mexico City on Sunday.

The 22-year-old vaulted over the protective wall at the side of the ring as the crowd hooted and whistled in derision. He was briefly persuaded back into the bullring by organisers but gave up before coming face to face with half-ton beast and skulked from the ring a second time.

He was arrested after the bullfight following complaints by organisers that he had breached his contract. He was later released after paying a fine.

The torero, who was badly gored in the leg during a bullfight several months ago, admitted that he had lost his nerve and would now retire from bullfighting altogether. "There are some things you must be aware of about yourself," he said. "I didn't have the ability, I didn't have the balls, this is not my thing."