Friday, March 2, 2012

JOKE: A grandmother was pushing her grandchild around WalMart

A grandmother was pushing her grandchild around WalMart in a buggy. Each time she put something in the basket, she would say, "And here's something for you, Diploma," or "This will make a cute little outfit for you, Diploma," and so on.

Eventually a bewildered shopper who'd heard all this finally asked, "Why do you keep calling your grandchild Diploma?"

The grandmother replied, "I sent my daughter to college and this is what she came home with!"

VIDEO: Man Makes Fuel of Himself..Dies

A man is dead from severe burns after authorities say he accidentally drank gasoline and later set himself on fire.

Dead is Gary Banning, who neighbors say was visiting a friend at an apartment on Roosevelt Road in Havelock.

Police say they got a call around 9:55 p.m. and found the 43-year-old man with severe burns. He was transported to the Jaycee Burn Center in Chapel Hill where he died Tuesday morning around 6:00 a.m.

Police say they learned Banning had accidentally drank gasoline earlier in the day. He spit it out onto his clothing, but never changed clothes. Later in the evening, police believe Banning was smoking a cigarette, started to doze off when the fire accidentally erupted.

Havelock police say alcohol was involved and drugs possibly involved.

They say earlier in the day someone at the apartment was using gasoline to clean grease off their hands and left a glass jar containing gasoline on the kitchen counter.

Police say their investigation is ongoing.

Store Using Phrase "Where the Prices are Sofa King Low!" Told to Quit It


The Sofa King, which advertises its location in Northampton, England as "next to the cafe with the car on the roof", said it has been using the line on its shop, vehicles and advertising since it launched nine years ago.

It is not the first time the company has been in hot water over its risqu� advertising. The Sofa King admitted that the Northamptonshire police had received complaints in 2004 but that they had not been pursued by the Crown Prosecution Service.

The Advertising Standards Authority received three complaints from readers who saw an ad in the Northampton Herald & Post and found it offensive and unsuitable for general public display.

In its defense The Sofa King said the slogan referred to pricing and that the words had "not been changed or run together or punctuation used in a way intended to cause offence".

However, the ASA said that the phrase could be interpreted as a derivative of the swear word "fuck", which research had found to be a word "so likely to offend that it should not be used in ads at all, even when it was relevant to the name of a product".

The ASA said because of that the slogan was likely to cause serious or widespread offence and it banned the business from continuing to use the phrase "Sofa King Low" in its advertising.

VIDEO: A hamster, mad with power, makes a dog jump non-stop for his amusement

VIDEO: Controversial Baby Dynamics Yoga

Millions of people around the world were left stunned when a video of Lena Fokina doing 'baby yoga' broke on the internet. The 51-year-old Russian was filmed spinning and flipping babies above her head and behind her back in such an outlandish fashion that several websites banned the footage for glorifying what to many would be considered child abuse. In fact, the moves were so shocking that most conceded they were being performed on a doll as no sane person would consider them acceptable. However, we tracked Lena down to a seminar called "Parenting the Deliberate Way" in Dahab, Egypt, where parents from across Europe were paying her to perform the same moves on their infants, some just a few months old. But Lena, who is a qualified PE teacher in her native Russia, insists the practice is totally safe and actually beneficial to children.

VIDEO: Take a Ride in a 660 horsepower Ferrari FF

advance video to 3:20 and enjoy the aural experience that IS Ferrari in this unusual four seat, four wheel drive V12 equipped beauty

VIDEO: One Year Old Plays Drums..WOW

**Sharing a Bit of Me in Earlier Times**

This is a song I grew up with back about 1969. The band is called the Farquahr. They're from Branford, Connecticut and used to play summers in Nantucket Island/Cape Cod, Massachusetts and winters at Mount Snow, Vermont.

As a teenager and on into my twenties, I would hear these guys often at night after a day of skiing. This song in particular brings back the fondest of memories of days gone by; winters of skiing everyday from the first snow until the snow was all gone and evenings dancing to music at the local hotspots. I did this for about ten years from the time I graduated high school until it was time to move on to a real life and real jobs and not just scraping by, season to season. These were the happiest of times when I'd work teaching skiing, cooking, hotel front didn't matter the work. What mattered was I could ski everyday that there was snow.
I hope you enjoy this. With much code tinkering, here it is.

My Eggs Don't Taste the Same Without You


My coffee is cold it's sitting there by the stove
My juice and my toast are there too
My heart's in a shambles I can't eat my scrambles
My eggs don't taste the same without you

Well the chair where you sat is occupied by the cat
I wish you had taken him too
I can do very nicely with you once over lightly
My eggs don't taste the same without you

No more good morning kiss
No more I love you
No more that's how the dog bit the paperboy kid
My wasn't that big news

Well if you'd only come back I'd let you keep that old cat
Let you wear your curlers too
My hearts in a shambles I can't eat my scrambles
My eggs don't taste the same without you
Photobucketgot your ears on?


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