An Australian, an American, and an Irishman were POWs in WWII. The prison commandant was a real bastard and told them he'd kill all three unless their combined pen�s length was twenty inches. The guards measured them and, fortunately, their combined length was exactly twenty inches.
Later, the Australian said, "Well, mates, if it weren't for my 10-incher, we'd all be dead."
The American said, "Naw, if it wasn't for my 8 inches, we'd all be dead."
The Irishman said, "If that guard didn't turn me on, we'd all be dead!"