Friday, September 21, 2012

JOKE: EXCUSES FOR CALLING IN SICK


* The voices in my head told me to clean all the guns today.

* When I got up this morning, I took two Ex-Lax in addition to my Prozac. I can't get off the crapper, but I feel good about it.

* I can't come in to work today because I'll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me for not showing up for work. Okay?

* The dog ate my car keys. We're going to hitchhike to the vet.

* I prefer to remain an enigma.

* My mother-in-law has come back as one of the undead and we must track her to her coffin to drive a stake through her heart and give her eternal peace. One day should do it.

* I refuse to travel to my job in the District until there is a commuter tax. I insist on paying my fair share.

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