VIDEO: The Real Tiger Woods Apology

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UPDATE: Dog-eating python returns for more

A 3m python that swallowed an Australian family's pet dog has struck again, attempting to devour a chihuahua. But this time, the dog's owner was able to prevent the animal from becoming dinner, dragging it out of the snake's mouth.

The same snake had stalked and eaten Dot, a nine-month-old Jack Russell terrier, while she playing in her backyard the week before Christmas. Dot's owner, Keri Stewart, said the serpent had stalked her beloved pet before consuming it whole.

"I had come home and let Dot out as usual (into the backyard) to do her business," she said. "I went out an hour and a half later and came across this massive big amethystine python, with a big lump in it."

Ms Stewart said she had become so distressed over the incident she had moved out of her Fallon Close home to get away from the snake. Australian Venom Zoo operator Stuart Douglas was called to remove the python, keeping it temporarily at his zoo before releasing it into the wild at a secret location well away from domestic animals.

Bag snatcher grabbed bag of dog poop

A bag-snatcher on a bicycle pinched a bag of poo from an elderly dog-walker in Worthing England.

The thief rode past the pensioner near the Post Office in High Street, Tarring, and grabbed a bag she had been using to clean up after her dog.

A spokeswoman for Sussex Police said: "A male on his pushbike came past her and snatched the bag, perhaps thinking that there was something of value inside. The lady was not harmed and clearly the thief stole nothing of value."

The crime took place at 10.45am on Sunday. The suspect was described as a black teenager.

Sons pull carriage with 81-year-old mother on 2800 mile walk through China

Wang Yuxia's husband once promised to take her to all the beautiful sights across the country. But when he suddenly died, it seemed her dream had died as well. So it was up to her sons to carry out their father's promise.

Realizing their 81-year-old mother gets carsick easily and they cannot afford to travel luxuriously, they built a three-wheeled carriage to take her around the country - powered only by their own feet and the determination to express love.

"We are not doing this for money or fame. We are just spreading the virtue of filial piety," said Wang Kai, 59. "Compared to what our mother has done for us, what we give in return is never enough," he added.

In 165 days, the two brothers have hauled the carriage more than 4,500 km from Heilongjiang province in the northeast to Fujian province in the southeast. Their target destination is Taiwan. "Our biggest dream is to carry our mother around the island," Wang Kai said.

The carriage, built for 5,000 yuan ($ 730), is fitted with three beds, windows and heat-retaining panels to make mom comfortable. The brothers named it "Thanksgiving" to express gratitude for their mother's love.

On the road, Wang Kai pulls the carriage from the front while younger brother Wang Rui, 57, pushes it from behind. So far, they have worn out six pairs of shoes. "I can walk 107 steps every minute and 10 hours every day, which means 65,000 steps or about 40 km a day," said Wang Rui.

Smell of pot from chimney leads to record bust in New Jersey

A patrol cop with a sensitive schnoz was credited today with uprooting what authorities say is the biggest marijuana-growing operation in New Jersey's history.

Police last month raided six homes - several of them $1 million McMansions - and seized more than $10 million worth of cannabis growing inside under artificial lights, authorities announced today.

"While law enforcement in New Jersey has encountered high-tech indoor marijuana growing operations in the past, we have not seen anything to match the volume of production of this criminal enterprise," said state Attorney General Paula T. Dow.

The bust might not have happened if Officer Thomas Lucasiewicz had been suffering from a head cold. The Monroe Township cop was on patrol Feb. 12 when he smelled burning marijuana in an upscale Middlesex County community.

At first, Lucasiewicz thought somebody might be smoking a joint in a car parked nearby, said Sgt. Steve Jones, a state police spokesman.

"But with his bloodhound senses, he realized it was much stronger than he first thought," Jones said. "He followed his nose. Then he saw smoke rising from a chimney."

Overpowered by the scent, Lucasiewicz called his squad. When backup arrived, Lucasiewicz knocked on the door of the single-story ranch house.

They were greeted by a surprised man, "the gardener, essentially, who was burning some of the unusable parts of the plants in the fireplace," Jones said.

Lucasiewicz arrested the gardener, Thu N. Nguyen, 44, and, realizing he had uncovered a huge grow operation, called in the state police.

Inside the rented home, investigators found 1,064 plants in four cultivation areas set up in the basement and the master bedroom. In the garage they found 50 pounds of packaged pot.

During the following week, state police raided five more rented homes in Millstone Township, Old Bridge, Manahawkin and Manalapan.

"They each had been turned into pot factories," Jones said.

Along with a vast array of indoor cultivation equipment, police seized 3,370 growing plants, 115 pounds of harvested marijuana and $65,000 cash from the four homes.

"These were not run-down houses," Jones said. "These were high-end homes in affluent neighborhoods. Several of them were worth in excess of $1 million and rented for $4,000 a month."

Jones said illicit growers usually don't operate out of their own homes because the houses are subject to forfeiture.

The growers took the liberty of modifying several of the homes, cutting 16-inch holes in the floors and ceilings to accommodate vents and ductwork, Jones said.

Six people, all of Vietnamese descent, have been charged with running marijuana cultivation facilities. They were also charged with theft of services for bypassing utility meters. Three remain at large and are believed to have fled the country, Jones said.

Nguyen, a Canadian citizen, remained at the Middlesex County Jail after failing to post $1 million bail.

Tuan A. Dang, 35, of Port Monmouth, and Ngoc H. Bui, 35, naturalized U.S. citizens who were both arrested Feb. 18 at the Millstone Township operation, were charged with maintaining a marijuana-growing facility and other counts. They both remain lodged on $1 million bail each at the Monmouth County Jail.

JOKE:Your Starship Captain just might be a redneck if...

your shuttlecraft has been up on blocks for over a month
he paints flames and a NRA sticker on the warp nacelles
you have a shuttle called "Billy Joe Bob"
he refers to Klingons as "Critters"
he refers to Photon Torpedoes as "Popguns"
he has the sensor array repaired with a bent coathanger and aluminum foil
he installs a set of bullhorns on the front of the saucer section
he says, "Got your ears on, good buddy" instead of "open hailing frequencies"
he hangs fuzzy dice over the viewscreen
he rewires his communicator into his belt buckle
he keeps a six-pack under his command chair and a gun rack above it
he says, "Yee-Ha!" instead of "Engage"
he has a hand-tooled holster for his phaser
he insists on calling his executive officer "Bubba"
he sets the fore viewscreen to reruns of "Bassmaster"
he programs the food replicator for beer, ribs, and turnip greens
he paints the starship John Deere green
he refers to a Pulsar as a "Blue Light Special"
he refers to the Mutara Nebula as a "swamp"
his moonshine is stronger than Romulan Ale
he sings "Lucille" instead of "Kathleen"
his idea of dress uniform is CLEAN bib overalls
he wears mirrored shades on the Bridge
his idea of a "gas giant" is that big ol' XO Bubba after a meal of beans and weenies
he sets phaser to "Cajun"

JOKE: The New Priest Arrived

A recently ordained Irish priest was delivering his first sermon to his new parish. "As I drove into your town last week, I witnessed three abominations: first, I saw a man in a field committing an unnatural act with a sheep. I drove on farther and saw another man committing the same vile act with another sheep. And then, at the edge of town, I saw a man committing an abomination with himself." A voice spoke up from the back of the congregation. "Aye, that'll be old Paddy Fitzpatrick. He never could catch a sheep!"