Monday, September 5, 2011
JOKE: ICE FISHING
It was a cold winter day. An old man walked out onto a frozen lake, cut a hole in the ice, dropped in his fishing line, and waited patiently for a bite. He was there for almost an hour, without even a nibble, when a young boy walked out onto the ice, cut a hole in the ice not next to him. The young boy dropped his fishing line and minutes later he hooked a Largemouth Bass.
The old man couldn't believe his eyes but chalked it up to plain luck.
But, shortly thereafter, the young boy pulled in another large catch.
The young boy kept catching fish after fish. Finally, the old man couldn't take it any longer. "Son, I've been here for over an hour without
even a nibble. You've been here only a few minutes and have caught a half dozen fish! How do you do it?"
The boy responded, "Roo raf roo reep ra rums rrarm."
"What was that?" the old man asked.
Again the boy responded, "Roo raf roo reep ra rums rarrm."
"Look," said the old man, "I can't understand a word you're saying."
The boy spit the bait into his hand and said, "You have to keep the worms warm!"
VIDEO: NYPD Horse Licking a Bulldog
24-Year-Old Dad with No Insurance Dies Of Tooth Infection
CINCINNATI -- Doctors at University Hospital in Cincinnati said a 24-year-old father died Wednesday from a tooth infection.
Patti Collins, wife of famed local musician Bootsy Collins, said she couldn't believe what happened to her nephew, Kyle Willis, who left behind a 6-year-old daughter.
"I said, 'What do you mean they're calling the family?' (My daughter) said, 'Mom, the infection (Willis) had in his tooth has gone to his brain," Collins said.
But doctors said that rare as it may be, what started out as a toothache eventually killed the young father and aspiring paralegal.
Family members said Willis' wisdom tooth started hurting two weeks ago. Dentists said it needed to be pulled, but being an unemployed single father, Willis decided to ignore the pain.
Collins said her nephew was out of work and didn't have health insurance.
But when Willis started getting headaches and his face began to swell, he went to the emergency room.
"The (doctors) gave him antibiotic and pain medication. But he couldn't afford to pay for the antibiotic, so he chose the pain meds, which was not what he needed," Collins said.
Doctors told Willis' family that while the pain had stopped, the infection kept spreading -- eventually attacking his brain and causing it to swell.
"He should have gone to the dentist to take care of the toothache, and it wouldn't have escalated to this. It's a lesson learned by all," Collins said.
Collins said the family wants to make sure what happened to Willis never happens to anyone else.
Family members said they are trying to get an account together for Willis' funeral expenses, and they're also hoping to create another fund for his daughter's college education.
Alligator bites off leg of elderly woman, 90, as she walked in garden
A 90-year-old woman had part of her leg bitten off after an 8ft-long alligator lunged at her as she walked in her Florida garden.
Margaret Webb was saved from a grisly death by a neighbor who saw her fighting for her life as the gator tried to drag her back into the water.
Officials said the elderly victim suffered severe leg trauma during the horrific attack and the remains of her limb were amputated at hospital.
Ms Webb had been walking in her garden when the alligator surged out of a 14ft deep canal that runs alongside the bottom of her garden.
Before she had time to run away the gator had surged up the grass and clamped its powerful jaws on her leg
Ms Webb was able to dig her fingers into the ground and hold on until neighbor Dwain Daniels, who was driving past, saw her in trouble and dashed to her rescue.
Mr Daniels was able to grab Ms Webb and managed to fire several shots at the gator. He believes he hit the gator, which slipped back into the water.
Ms Webb was airlifted from her home in Copeland, Florida, to hospital where she remains in a critical condition.
Wildlife officials praised the heroic actions of Mr Daniels, who had been driving past in his pick up truck when he witnessed the attack.
'He looked over saw the lady on the ground half in the water, wheeled around and jumped out of his truck to come to her aid,' said Jayson Horadam, Captain of Law Enforcement for Florida Wildlife Commission.
'It appears he was able to pull her away from the gator.'
Surgeons at Lee Memorial Hospital in Fort Myers were unable to save Ms Webb's mangled leg and had to amputate the limb.
Gabriella Ferraro, a spokeswoman for the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission, said: 'I believe there was an amputation.'
Two licensed wranglers searched for two hours in an attempt to find the gator.
Alligator attacks are rare, but often prove deadly. There were five alligator attacks on people in Florida last year.
Man finds $150,000 in his garden
As the old saw goes, money doesn't grow on trees. But sometimes it sprouts up in the garden. An unemployed man in northern Illinois was out working in his backyard when he came across some serious green: bags filled with $150,000 cash.
Wayne Sabaj was headed to pick some broccoli to go with his roast. The carpenter spotted duffel bags that looked like trash by the peppers -- but they turned out to be a cash crop: stacks of $20 bills that added up to about $150,000. The 49-year-old, who is living with his dad, did not exactly jump for joy.
The out-of-work carpenter told ABC7, "I could really use this money." But with this money comes trouble. He explained, "With my luck, it would be bank robbery and I'd get caught and say I'd robbed a bank."
So the honest man with money troubles alerted the police to his amazing backyard treasure.
For now, police haven't a clue to where the cash came from: There are no reported burglaries in the area, and no banks have been robbed.
Then there was the concern that whoever left the money behind would be back, and that's a problem the Sabaj men would rather have solved by the police.
If nobody comes forward to legitimately claim the cash, there may be a happy ending for the man tending his garden: Police will help figure out if Sabaj can keep the money. The carpenter has retained an attorney just in case.
For now, the cash is in custody with the country sheriff, who left behind a card on the lawn where Sabaj found the bags, bearing the simple message, Please call.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
~WHIRLED GNUS~
Followers
Blog Archive
- ► 2012 (1250)
- ▼ 2011 (2227)
- ► 2010 (2292)