Man just gets out of jail free after strip Monopoly turns into jealous brawl

A game of strip Monopoly ended in a jealous row – and a man nearly going straight to jail. Gary Williamson, 22, a kitchen manager, persuaded his girlfriend and another woman to play the risque version of the popular board game at his flat. Instead of paying rent when they landed on another person's property, they paid up by losing an item of clothing. But when the three were naked, it is alleged that the other woman made a play for Williamson, sparking a brawl among the three players.
The scuffle got so out of hand that it ended up with the police being called and Williamson being arrested and charged with assaulting both the 20 year-olds. He only escaped jail because the two women were too embarrassed to give evidence. Ian Dacre, prosecuting at Blackpool England Magistrates Court, said: "The charges arose from a somewhat unusual game of Monopoly – strip Monopoly. They players had been drinking and they all ended up stark naked." One of the young women the took exception to the behavior of the other.
"An argument started and one of the girls said she was headbutted by the defendant and the other said she had her hair pulled by him." Williamson was the boardgame's Boot with his girlfriend Leah McDonnell the "Battleship" and Micha Robinson the "Racing Car". Williamson denied the assaults and District Judge Jeff Brailsford was told by the prosecutor that both the women had not attended court to give evidence. The prosecutor said: "It may well be that their decision not to attend is that they are both embarrassed by what happened."
The judge refused to allow the case to be adjourned. But when the Crown offered no evidence he dismissed the charges stating: "I have taken the view that the two girls may not wish to attend taking into account what is said to have gone on." Robert Castle, for the defense, said: "My case would have been that my client's girlfriend was annoyed by the other girl's advances towards him and that all he did was to try and keep them apart." Outside court Williamson said: "I am glad that's not hanging over me – I shall not be playing Monopoly again."

JOKE: A Jew, a Catholic and a Mormon were having drinks

A Jew, a Catholic and a Mormon were having drinks at the bar after an interfaith convention.
The Jew, bragging about his virility said, "I have four sons, one more and I’ll have a basketball team!"
The Catholic pooh-poohed this accomplishment, stating, "That’s nothing, I have 10 sons, one more and I’ll have a football team."
To which the Mormon replied, "You fellers ain’t got a clue. I have 17 wives, one more and I’ll have a golf course!"

Police officers seize high-powered sports car - then crash it

Two police officers have crashed in a high-powered sports car after it was confiscated from its driver. The pair climbed into the Mitsubishi Lancer Evolution in Hale while waiting for a recovery truck.
But the officers ended up ploughing the turbo-charged, four-wheel drive car into the gardens of two luxury homes, rolling it on to its side. The officers were found inside the car early yesterday morning. One suffered minor injuries and the other was left severely shaken. No-one else was hurt.
The smash is now being investigated by officers from Greater Manchester England Police's professional standards unit. A spokesman for the force said both officers, who are police constables from the Trafford division, have been suspended from driving duties 'with immediate effect'.
Chief Supt Mark Roberts, divisional commander for Trafford, said: “I can assure the local community that this incident will be rigorously investigated. Thankfully, no members of the public were injured. I would like to apologise to residents if this incident has caused any problems or inconvenience.”

JAILED SAUDI MEN BLAME BURQA WEARING TEASE

A group of Saudi men jailed for flirting have claimed they were driven to it by a provocatively dressed woman who flashed the bridge of her nose at them.
Faisal Iqbal, 24, said the woman was wearing a sexually alluring electric blue burqa with a mesh face grille which was so revealing that nothing was left to the imagination, not even nostrils.
He said: "I see everything - eyebrows, eyelashes, almost all of her nose, front teeth, the lot. She like dirty porno girl out of Hustler.
"I go in frenzy and start sing to her the Barry Whites. I read about women like this in the dirty books but never expect to see one in flesh."
He added: "I sing 'Take it off babe…take it all off…I don't wanna see no niqab…I don't wanna see no hijab…because, baby, this night, we're gonna get it on' and I thrust the hips.
"She scream out, police grab me by testicles and I end up in dungeon in Riyadh with truncheon stuff up arse. Sideways. If she not up for it, why she dress like dirty slut?"
The men were arrested by Saudia Arabia's religious police, the highly-trained 'mutaween', who specialize in hunting down rape victims, witches and women drivers.
They are now investigating the allegedly flirtatious woman. If convicted she will face the traditional Saudi punishment of being run over by a solid gold Bentley.

This Camel is Ticklish LOL

JOKE: Father Guido Meets the Virgin Mary

Father Guido was a devout and pure man. When he finally appeared at the Pearly Gates, Saint Peter greeted him, "Hello, Father Guido. We've been expecting you. Welcome to Heaven! Because you were such a holy man, I'll grant you a wish."

Guido immediately replied, "Well, I have always wanted to meet the Virgin Mother."

Saint Peter took him to Virgin Mary, where Father Guido said, "Mother, I have always been a great admirer of yours. I have studied everything I could about you. I followed your life as best I could. Yet I've always wondered: every painting of you shows you with a slightly sad look. What was it that made you sad?"

She replied, "Honestly? I was hoping for a girl."

�� Got Caption ?? 9/5

Miss Universe China erp

Woman Says Creepy Boss Loved her Feet

A woman claims her former boss at an Atlanta rehab facility is a sexual predator and foot fetishist who uses his job "to leverage himself into unwanted sexual situations with female employees." She claims the boss "would always think of ways to touch her feet," that he bought "lotions and was trying to rub them on (her) feet," that he bought "nail polish and continuously asked her if he could paint her toenails," that he made her "spray him with tanning lotion while he was wearing nothing but his boxer shorts," and that he came over and mowed her lawn, though her husband didn't like it.
Tammy Queen sued Transition House and her former boss, Charles Crutchfield, in Fulton County Superior Court.
Queen says that "Crutchfield was obsessed with Ms. Queen's feet. He would always think of ways to touch her feet. He would try and take her shoes off and ask to massage her feet."
He claimed he was a massage therapist and kept a massage table in his office, and would "frequently ask her if he could give her a massage," Queen says. "Ms Queen always refused."
She claims that Crutchfield "purchased lotions and was trying to rub them on Ms. Queen's feet. He also purchased nail polish and continuously asked her if he could paint her toenails.
"At this point, defendant Crutchfield began threatening Ms. Queen that she would be fired if she did not allow him to put lotion on her feet. He would then just pull her shoes off as she was telling him no. Ms. Queen was frightened that he was going to try to rape her."
The complaint contains a litany of other allegations, many of the unusual, to say the least. Queen, who is married, claims Crutchfield "was obsessed with Ms. Queen's clothing. He would go through the department store circulars and circle the clothes that he thought would look good on Ms. Queen. After circling them, he would go out and buy the clothes and give them to Ms. Queen.
"Shortly after, the clothes began to include lingerie. Ms. Queen would always tell defendant Crutchfield that she did not want the clothes from him and that her husband was getting really upset, but defendant Crutchfield would only buy her even more clothing.
"There were many occasions where defendant Crutchfield would show up at Ms. Queen's house and mow her grass. Even though Ms. Queen told him not to do that, he continued. Ms. Queen's husband had witnessed defendant Crutchfield mowing the lawn."
He bought her jewelry, "some of which was very expensive and eventually included an engagement ring," Queen says. She says she never kept it, but often gave it away "to another employer who wanted it."
Then, she says, he bought her bathing suits, and she refused his requests that she "try them on for him."
She says he touched her "inappropriately" and "would also force Ms. Queen to spray him with tanning lotion while he was wearing nothing but his boxer shorts."
He took photos of her "and pasted them all over a cabinet in his office," the complaint states. "Ms. Queen showed this to Mr. Ed Brown, chief executive officer, but he did nothing about it."
She says he also "was creating a very hostile work environment by bringing prostitutes into his office and having sex with them at THI during the day. Some of the prostitutes that defendant Crutchfield was having sex with were in the THI program and he made them have sex with him to get into the program."
And, she says, when she complained to CEO Brown "about defendant Crutchfield's offensive and inappropriate comments and actions, he told her that if she was not being touched that she should not be alarmed."