JOKE: A young boy and his mother are traveling

A young boy and his mother are traveling across the state by train to see his aunt. While waiting in line to purchase tickets, the young fellow starts sucking on his thumb. "Take that out of your mouth" his mother demands, but later, while waiting on the platform for their train to arrive, he once again slips his thumb into his mouth. "Would you keep that thumb out of your mouth?", his mother demands. They finally settle into their seats and habit takes over yet again, the little boys mother takes the thumb from her son's mouth and says "Listen, if you keep that up, you'll blow-up like a balloon and pop into a million pieces". This shocks the boy into thinking twice before sticking his thumb into his mouth again.

Just before the train leaves the station, a very pregnant woman struggles down the isle and settles into the seat directly across from the boy and his mother. The lady catches the boy looking wide-eyed at her enormous belly and smiles with motherly pride until the boy looks up with a sly smile and says in a conspiritory tone, "I know what you've been doing!"

VIDEO: Seen This 'Lil Ditty by Greyson Chance?

Teacher Apologizes..For Biting Off Man's Ear in Restaurant..Hungry Much?

Susan Mwarabu apologized profusely and repeatedly Thursday before she was sentenced in Ramsey County District Court in Minnesota for biting off -- and apparently swallowing -- part of a man's ear.

"I've disappointed myself, my family and hundreds of students," said Mwarabu, who lost her teaching job at Northfield Middle School after she was charged in the incident. It happened March 14 at the Uptowner Cafe in St. Paul.

Mwarabu, 31, of Rochester, pleaded guilty April 5 to felony third-degree assault. She did not know her victim, Christopher Hough, 33, before the incident. "What Susan Mwarabu did to me on March 14 will never make sense," Hough told the court Thursday.

District Judge Rosanne Nathanson gave Mwarabu a stay of imposition sentence and up to five years on probation. She was ordered to serve 60 days, but can do so on home monitoring or other programming if she is eligible.

If she complies with probation's conditions, the conviction eventually will become a gross misdemeanor.

Nathanson gave Mwarabu until Sept. 2 to turn herself in after her attorneys requested she be able to visit her ill mother in Kenya before she reports to the workhouse.

What a Photo! Pimp gets 18 Years..Maybe He'll Get a New Hairdo

Society Hill pimp Allen E. Brown got a little testy in court this morning and was sentenced to 18 years in prison by Judge Kevin Callahan in Hudson County Superior Court in Jersey City.

Brown, aka Prince, was shocked at the length of the sentence. "18 years?" Brown blurted out in court when Callahan announced the sentence.

"This will take you to your 60th birthday until you see the light of day" said Callahan. "The facts of this case are horrendous. They are vast."

Brown, 48, who authorities say operating the ring out of a home on Lyon Avenue in the upscale development on the Hackensack River, was sentenced to 10 years for racketeering and eight years for extortion.

When Brown first walked into the courtroom he said to his lawyer, Adam Reisman, "I'm tired of your bulls---." His hair was styled exquisitely, with wavy strands curled on his forehead and a long thin ponytail hanging over his shoulders.

Even before he was sentenced Brown told the judge he didn't understand how much time he faced. His attorney told the judge Brown refused to go over the sentencing materials with him.

Callhan said he was concerned because in Brown's written statement Brown seemed to back away from some of the admissions he made when he pleaded guilty in early April. Callahan sent the defense lawyer and Brown out to discuss the matter and when they returned Brown said he stood by his plea hearing admissions.

At the plea hearing Brown, who admitted he ran a human trafficking and prostitution ring, was told he faced from 12 to 20 years in prison.

Authorities say he enslaved women and girls, some as young at 17, and forced them to turn tricks on the streets. He even turned some into drug addicts, authorities say. Authorities say the woman were forced to earn $500 on weeknights and $1,000 on weekend nights, or else they were denied entry back into the house, were denied drugs or were beaten.

Assistant Attorney General, Annmarie Taggert said Brown extorted a $600,000 inheritance from a woman who turned over the money because the woman feared for her and her niece's lives. Taggert added that one woman who refused become a prostitute was handcuffed to a bed and forced to take heroin until she became addicted.

Brown's mother, Tecora Brown, and his sister, Veronica, attended the sentencing. Tecora Brown pleaded guilty to promoting prostitution and is not expected to be given prison time. Authorities say the Lyon Avenue home belonged to Tecora Brown.

"It's all lies, " Veronica Brown said after the sentencing. She said her brother was trying to help the women who were already drug-addicted prostitutes. Brown said that her brother bought one of the women a computer and that woman now works at a hospital in South Jersey.

VIDEO: Cats and Dogs ..Guess Who Runs the Show

Girl grows two new kidneys after old ones fail

A girl left seriously ill when both her kidneys failed astounded medical experts by growing two new ones.
Angel Burton suffered from painful kidney infections from birth to the point where she required surgery at the age of five.
But surgeons were amazed to discover the little girl had four kidneys, with two new fully-formed organs sitting on top of her old ones.

And the new ones had taken over the role of the others, meaning she was effectively 'cured' of kidney failure.
Now, three years on, Angel, now eight, is fighting fit and her family are still thankful for the miracle that changed her life.

She has an rare condition known as 'duplex kidney' - common to just a handful of people in Britain.

A duplex kidney is fused to the other at the centre and may share or have an independent ureter draining urine to the bladder.

In Angel's case both her kidneys are 'duplex' and fused to the other. Each has a separate ureter, meaning that she has four kidneys and four ureters.

Doctors believe the initial scans missed the extra kidneys because they sat immediately on top of each other and would have shown up as one.

Angel's mother, Claire Burton, 32, from Louth, Lincolnshire gave birth to her daughter in 2001 but within months her baby's health started to decline.

Doctors performed tests and she was diagnosed with bilateral reflux, which meant that the valves to her bladder weren't working properly and urine was getting into her kidneys, causing infections.

Angel's condition continued to be monitored and she was regularly screened for infections and given kidney scans.
On one check-up it was revealed her kidneys had suffered serious scarring and she would have to have an operation.

She underwent surgery at Sheffield Children's Hospital in England in October 2007 to create an artificial valve but during the operation doctors spotted the extra kidneys.
Mrs Burton, who has two other children with husband of ten years, Michael, said: 'They'd been in there an hour and a quarter when the surgeon came out.

He said: 'We've found something very, very strange considering the amount of scans Angel's had this year.'
'He went on to explain they'd put a camera in Angel's bladder so they could repair the valves. They'd found the two openings that were supposed to be there and they'd gone ahead and repaired the two valves.
'But then they'd found two more openings and when they'd put the camera up, these openings led up to two more perfectly healthy kidneys, just sitting on top of the other ones.

'He said: 'They are totally independent. We are just stunned that these have never been picked up on a scan. She's been having intensive scanning for five years and they've never shown up. It looks like the healthy ones have taken over.''

She said: 'It's a real miracle. It's absolutely amazing that none of her earlier scans picked the extra kidneys up. We're just so grateful to have Angel back to her happy, healthy self.'

With her extra kidneys doing all the work of her old ones, Angel, now eight, is fully recovered and looking forward to a healthy future.
Prasad Godbole, consultant paediatric urologist at Sheffield Children's Hospital who operated on Angel said: 'I was surprised we had one (a duplex) in Angel because none of the previous x-rays had shown that. Sometimes you could miss it but I was surprised because looking at all the previous x-rays there was no suggestion of this. Her kidneys are working fine.'

Oops! Jailers put witness and man he implicated in same cell

A witness in a murder case was beaten up after Hennepin County Minnesota jailers mistakenly placed him in the same holding cell as the man he'd implicated.

Murder suspect Jonathan Nicholas "Thirsty" Turner was charged Thursday with tampering with a witness, a first-degree felony. That charge is atop first-degree murder charges he faces in two 2003 shootings.

Rondah Kinchlow, spokeswoman for the Hennepin County attorney's office, said prosecutors "always" notify the jail when two prisoners shouldn't be put together. But sheriff's office spokeswoman Lisa Kiava said that didn't happen.

"Jail staff had no information that these two inmates should have been kept separate," she said. "We do have policy and practice in place that when we receive information that inmates should be kept separately, we do so."

The criminal complaint against Turner, 24, does not name the beaten man and does not say why he was in jail, how he wound up in the same cell as Turner or how bad his injuries were.

Jailers stopped the beating within minutes.

An affidavit by Hennepin County sheriff's Detective Bernie Bogenreif said the incident occurred March 4 when Turner was taken to a holding cell to await a morning court hearing.

He wrote that the two were mistakenly placed in the same cell after the witness had provided a taped statement implicating Turner in the killings.

The detective wrote that Turner had seen the state's evidence against him and knew of the taped statement.

Turner faces a June trial on two counts of first-degree murder in the August 2003 killing of Javon Spencer, 19, of Minnetonka. Prosecutors say Spencer was a casualty of a turf war to decide which gang could sell drugs in a corner of the Phillips neighborhood.
Turner was convicted of the murder in November and sentenced to life plus five years. But in February, a judge threw out the conviction after both prosecutors and defense attorneys said one of the state's trial witnesses actually was in jail when he claimed to have seen Turner shoot Spencer.

Hennepin County prosecutors re-indicted Turner in the Spencer case. He also faces charges of first-degree murder in the July 2003 shooting death of Marcus Julius Dortch, 24, of Minneapolis. Dortch was shot several times in the back as he fled two men with guns.

One witness told police that as the wounded Dortch lay on the ground, Turner stood over him and continued to pull the trigger of his pistol, even though the gun was empty.

Turner was scheduled for an 8 a.m. conference in the Spencer killing March 4, and that's when he was placed in the cell with the witness.

Bogenreif wrote that a surveillance tape showed the attack.

The witness told Bogenreif that Turner had confronted him about "jumping on his case" as well as for his association with another witness who testified at Turner's trial.

That man, known by the nickname "Lemon," didn't tell deputies what had happened but told his attorney once he got to court.

Bogenreif wrote that the account was corroborated by several other prisoners in the holding cell at the time of the attack.

Investigators also seized documents from Turner's cell, and the detective wrote that "in those documents, the defendant states: 'I just hit Lemon in his mouth for making a statement on me. That's why I'm in the hole right now. I tried my best not to do it, but he betrayed me. I just couldn't stand it. He sat there and lied to me and tried to put it on his kids. It was crazy.' "

The detective said they found other documents Turner allegedly wrote in which he "attempts to script testimony of other possible witnesses in advance of his murder trial."

School bus driver fired after being caught relieving herself on bus

The school bus driver accused of using plastic bags as a bathroom on her bus is now fired. That woman was driving for First Student bus company and Milwaukee Public Schools. Per the district's contract with First Student bus company, MPS has demanded the driver not have any contact with kids.

The driver allegedly was dropping off bags filled with her own waste. It was near I-94 and 60th St. One of the neighbors actually caught on camera, the driver in the act of using the bags as a bathroom. A second tape and another witness backs up the acts.

One of the neighbors said, "She took down her pants and turned around and did something you'd probably never do on a bus... The bus would stop right here by the curb, once in a while by the telephone pole."

The video that neighbor shot shows the driver flicking a cigarette out of the bus, driving down one block and then dumping her own waste along the street.

The neighbor took his tape to the police. Police called the owner of the bus First Student. A spokeswoman says the driver is one of their most experienced. Again, she has been indefinitely suspended.

JOKE: Teeth Down There

A little boy goes shopping with his mother and is
standing outside of the ladies dressing room waiting for his Mom to come out. While waiting the little boy gets bored and just when his Mom comes walking out, she sees her son sliding his hand up a mannequin's skirt.

"Get your hand out of there," she shouts! "Don't you know that women have teeth down there?"

The little boy quickly snatches his hand away and
thanks his lucky stars he didn't get bitten. For the
next ten years, this little boy grows up believing all
women have teeth between their legs. When he's 16, he gets a girlfriend.

One night, while her parents are out of town, she
invites him over for a little action. After an hour
of making out, she says, "You know, you could go a little further if you want."

What do you mean," he asks?

"Well, why don't you put your hand down there," she asks, pointing to her crotch.

"Hell no," he cries, "You've got teeth down there!"

"Don't be ridiculous," she responds, "there's no
such thing as teeth down there!"

"Yes, there are," he says, "my Mom told me so."

"No, there aren't," she insists. "Here, look for
yourself." With that, she pulls down her pants and
gives him a little peek.

"No, I'm sorry" he says. "My Mom already told me
that all women have teeth down there."

"Oh for crying out loud," she cries! She whips off
her panties, throws her legs behind her head and
says, "LOOK, I DON'T have any teeth down there."

The boy takes a good long look and replies, "Well,
after seeing the condition of those gums, I'm not
surprised!"