Turkey Vulture Hitches Ride in Helicopter during Super Bowl

A Florida pilot has quite the story to tell, and the video to prove it. Paul Appleton was flying a helicopter, snapping photos during the Super Bowl, when a turkey vulture suddenly flew into his aircraft. Appleton says the bird hitched a 20 mile ride on his lap. The safest thing to do was to keep the bird in the aircraft until he landed. "I lost sight of him for a second and then I heard a boom and all of a sudden I have a turkey vulture sitting on my lap up against my chest and on my forearm," Appleton recalled. "I don't know the exact size or weight of it, but it was a pretty big bird." The bird flew out of the helicopter after it landed. Appleton says his headset and glasses were partially knocked off when the bird flew into the chopper, but only suffered a small scrape on his forehead.

Man stabbed through the eye by girlfriend's stiletto shoe

A woman stabbed her boyfriend through the eye with a stiletto during a row in a taxi, it has emerged.

The blow was so severe that the heel touched Gavin Taylor's brain.

It is thought the incident occurred while Mr Taylor, 28 was in a taxi with his girlfriend in the early hours of Sunday morning after a night out in Huddersfield, West Yorks,UK.

The shoe is believed to have pierced his eye, passed through his eye socket and touched his brain.

Following the horrific incident Mr Taylor, of Stalybridge, Cheshire, was rushed to Huddersfield Royal Infirmary where he was treated before being transferred to a specialist ward in Leeds, West Yorks.

A West Yorkshire Police spokesman said: "At around 2am on Sunday, police received reports of a serious assault which occurred in a vehicle travelling through Huddersfield town centre.

"A 28-year-old man was struck to the head and taken to Huddersfield Royal Infirmary.

"He was subsequently transferred to Leeds General Infirmary and is currently in a stable but critical condition."

Staci Hargreaves, 33, of Stalybridge, has been charged with wounding with intent to cause grievous bodily harm.

She spoke only to confirm her name when she appeared at Huddersfield Magistrates Court.

JOKE: the Pastor found a pink envelope containing $1,000.

One Sunday, in counting the money in the weekly offering, the Pastor of a small church found a pink envelope containing $1,000. It happened again the next week.
The following Sunday, he watched as the offering was collected and saw an elderly woman put the distinctive pink envelope on the plate. This went on for weeks until the pastor, overcome by curiosity, approached her.

'Ma'am, I couldn't help but notice that you put $1,000 a week in the collection plate,' he stated.

'Why yes,' she replied, 'every week my son sends me money and I give some of it to the church'

The pastor replied, 'That's wonderful. But $1000 is a lot, are you sure you can afford this? How much does he send you?'

The elderly woman answered, '$10,000 a week.'

The pastor was amazed. 'Your son is very successful; what does he do for a living?'

'He is a veterinarian,' she answered. 'That's an honorable profession, but I had no idea they made that much money,' the pastor said. 'Where does he practice?'

The woman answered proudly, 'In Nevada. He has two cat houses, one in Las Vegas, and one in Reno.'

VIDEO: Turkey Vulture Crashlands In Pilot's Lap

MIAMI -- A Florida pilot has quite the story to tell, and the video to prove it. Paul Appleton was flying a helicopter, snapping photos during the Super Bowl, when a turkey vulture suddenly flew into his aircraft. Appleton says the bird hitched a 20 mile ride on this lap. The safest thing to do was to keep the bird in the aircraft until he landed. "I lost sight of him for a second and then I heard a boom and all of a sudden I have a turkey vulture sitting on my lap up against my chest and on my forearm," Appleton recalled. "I don't know the exact size or weight of it, but it was a pretty big bird." The bird flew out of the helicopter after it landed. Appleton says his headset and glasses were partially knocked off when the bird flew into the chopper, but only suffered a small scrape on his forehead.

Cat..White..Green Eyes..Purrfect Condition

VIDEO: TOYOTA LAWNMOWER RECALL NEXT LOL..quickie vid

Dubai court annuls marriage to 'bearded lady'

An Arabic country's ambassador to Dubai has had his marriage contract annulled after discovering the bride was cross-eyed and had facial hair.

The woman had worn an Islamic veil, known as the niqab, on the few occasions the couple had met.

The envoy, who has not been identified, told a Sharia court her mother had tricked him by showing him pictures of the bride's sister. He only discovered the deception when he lifted the woman's veil to kiss her.

The court had annulled the marriage contract but rejected a $130,000 (�83,000) compensation claim for gifts he had bought his intended.

THIS STINKS

A new supervisor at the Jewish Theological Seminary allegedly made life a smelly hell for a longtime employee by emitting "constant barrages of . . . flatulence" in her work area, a lawsuit claims.

The woman who's suing, Roberta Feinsmith, 67, got glowing reviews in her 12 years as an executive assistant at the Morningside Heights institution - until Alan Cooper was hired as provost in 2007, according to the suit, filed in Manhattan. Cooper the gasbag also had daily yelling and cursing "fits," Feinsmith claims.

The Fair Lawn, NJ, resident repeatedly objected, then caught wind of a bigger problem. Cooper, she learned, sent a mass e-mail last May to the school's full-time staff advocating that older workers put themselves out to pasture.

Baby boomers, he wrote "have created a kind of bottleneck in the work world. The frustration this poses for the young and talented should be obvious." He fired Feinsmith the next day.

JOKE: A couple was watching Discovery Channel

A couple was watching a Discovery Channel special about a West African "bush tribe" whose men all had penises 24 inches long.
When the black male reaches a certain age, a string is tied around his penis and on the other end is a weight. After a while, the weight stretches the penis to 24 inches.

Later that evening as the husband was getting out of the shower, his wife looked at him and said, 'How about we try the African string-and- weight procedure?

'The husband agreed and they tied a string and a weight to his penis.

A few days later, the wife asked the husband,'How is our little "tribal experiment" coming along?'

'Well, it looks like we're about half way there,' he replied.

'Wow, you mean it's grown to 12 inches?'

'No, it's turned black.

VIDEO: Cat Food Sandwiches - David Lindley

skip the monologue and go to 3:45..the guy is a unique musician