JOKE: Charles and Camilla

Camilla bought new shoes for her wedding which got increasingly tighter and tighter as the day went on. That night, when the festivities were finally over and they retired to their room, she flopped on the bed and said, "Charles, darling. Please remove my shoes. My feet are killing me!"

Her ever-obedient Prince of Wales attacked her right shoe with vigor, but it would not budge.

"Harder!" yelled Camilla. "Harder!"

Charles yelled back, "I'm trying, darling! But it's just so bloody tight!"

"Come on! Give it all you've got!" she cried.

Finally, when it released, Charles let out a big groan and Camilla exclaimed, "There! Oh, God, that feels so good!"

In their bedroom next door, the Queen said to Prince Phillip, "See? I told you with a face like that, she was still a virgin!"

Meanwhile, as Charles tried to remove her left shoe, he cried, "Oh, God, darling! This one's even tighter!"

At which Prince Phillip said to the Queen, "That's my boy: once a Navy man, always a Navy man!"

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JOKE: The Irishman and the Genie

An Irishman walking along the beach found a bottle lying in the sand. He picked it up, brushed it off, and out popped a genie. "Since you have freed me from this bottle, I will grant you three wishes."

The Irishman thought a moment and said, "I'm feeling a might thirsty. I think I'll wish for a pint of stout." And poof! there was a pint of stout in his hand.

He drank it down and started to toss the bottle away, when the genie said, "Look at that bottle before you throw it away."

He did and watched as it magically refilled itself with stout. "That's a magic bottle. It will refill itself whenever you empty it. So what are your other wishes?"

The Irishman grinned. "I'll be taking two more of these!"