Muslim girl, 19, 'stoned to death after taking part in beauty contest'

Murdered: Katya Koren was attacked after taking part in a beauty contest which her friends said angered hardline Muslims

A teenage Muslim girl was stoned to death under 'Sharia law' after taking part in a beauty contest in Ukraine.

Katya Koren, 19, was found dead in a village in the Crimea region near her home. 

Friends said she liked wearing fashionable clothes and had come seventh in a beauty contest. 

Her battered body was buried in a forest and was found a week after she disappeared.

Police have opened a murder probe and are investigating claims that three Muslim youths killed her claiming her death was justified under Islam.  

One of the three - named as 16-year-old Bihal Gaziev - is under arrest and told police she had 'violated the laws of Sharia'.

Gaziev said he had no regrets about her death because she had violated the laws of Islam.

a funny for you~

You might recall that John Hinckley was a seriously deranged young man who shot President Reagan in the early 1980's. Hinckley was absolutely obsessed with movie star Jodie Foster, and in his twisted mind, loved Jodie to the point that to make himself well known to her, he attempted to assassinate President Reagan. There is speculation Hinckley may soon be released as having been rehabilitated. Consequently, you will appreciate the following letter from Nancy Reagan to John Hinckley: 


To: John Hinckley 


From: Mrs. Nancy Reagan 


My family and I wanted to drop you a short note to tell you how pleased we are with the great strides you are making in your recovery. In our country's spirit of understanding and forgiveness, we want you to know that we bear no grudge against you for shooting President Reagan. We are fully aware that mental stress and pain could have driven you to such an act of desperation. We're confident that you will soon make a complete recovery and return to your family to join the world again as a healthy and productive man. Best wishes, Nancy Reagan & Family 


P.S. While you have been incarcerated, Barack Obama has been banging Jodie Foster like a screen door in a tornado. You might want to look into that.

JOKE: A police motorcycle cop stops a driver

A police motorcycle cop stops a driver for running a red light.

The driver is a real jerk, steps out of his car and comes striding toward the officer, demanding to know why he is being harassed by the Gestapo!

So the officer calmly tells him of the red light violation.

The motorist instantly goes on a tirade, questioning the officer's ancestry, sexual orientation, etc., in rather explicit terms.

The tirade goes on without the officer saying anything.

When the officer finishes writing the ticket he puts an "AH" in the lower right corner of the narrative portion of the ticket. He then hands it to the 'violator' for his signature.

The guy signs the ticket angrily, and when presented with his copy points to the "AH" and demands to know what it stands for.

The officer says, "That's so when we go to court, I'll remember that you're an asshole!"

Two months later they're in court. The 'violator' has a bad driving record and he is in danger of losing his license, so he hired a lawyer to represent him.

On the stand the officer testifies to seeing the man run the red light.

Under cross examination the defense attorney asks;

"Officer is this a reasonable facsimile of the ticket that you issued to my client?"

Officer responds,

"Yes, sir, that is the defendant's copy, his signature and mine, same number at the top."

Lawyer:

"Officer, is there any particular marking or notation on this ticket you don't normally make?"

"Yes, sir, in the lower right corner of the narrative there is an "AH," underlined."

"What does the "AH" stand for, officer?"

"Aggressive and hostile, Sir."

"Aggressive and hostile?"

"Yes, Sir.

"Officer, are you sure it doesn't stand for asshole?"

"Well, sir, you know your client better than I do."

GOT CAPTION? 6/01 v. 2.0

GOT CAPTION? 6/01

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JOKE: An Arab walked into a Jewish delicatessen

An Arab walked into a Jewish delicatessen and asked the price of a corned beef sandwich. The owner, not exactly thrilled with Arabs, said, "Twenty dollars."

"Great. I'll take four." He returned the next day and ordered four pastrami sandwiches.

"That'll be two hundred dollars." The Arab gladly paid the full amount. The third day, the Arab saw a sign on the delicatessen door: "No Jews allowed!"

GOT CAPTION? 5/31 v. 2.0

GOT CAPTION? 5/31

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Naomi Campbell in race row after being compared to Cadbury chocolate bar

Cadbury is facing the prospect of a black consumer boycott after it compared Naomi Campbell to a chocolate bar in a new advertising campaign. The supermodel is incensed that Cadbury used her name in the strap line to promote its new chocolate bar called Bliss, accusing the company of racism. The ad says: "Move over Naomi, there's a new diva in town."

Campbell has revealed she is considering "every option available" after Cadbury, owned by the US giant Kraft, refused to pull the ad campaign, which ran in newspapers last week: "I am shocked. It's upsetting to be described as chocolate, not just for me, but for all black women and black people. I do not find any humour in this. It is insulting and hurtful." The model's mother, Valerie Morris, backed her daughter, saying: "I'm deeply upset by this racist advert. Do these people think they can insult black people and we just take it? This is the 21st century, not the 1950s. Shame on Cadbury."

Disgust at the ad prompted members of the public to complain to the campaign group Operation Black Vote (OBV), which has called for Cadbury to apologise. OBV's Simon Woolley said that without an apology, the "only recourse black people have is not to buy its chocolate". He has written to the American civil rights activists Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson to ask them to mobilise the country's Afro-American population. Mr Woolley said that, for black people, being likened to chocolate was as bad as being called a golliwog.

"Racism in the playground starts with black children being called 'chocolate bar'. At best, this is insensitive, and at worst it demonstrates Cadbury's utter disregard for causing offence. Its lack of apology just adds insult to injury. The Eurocentric joke is not funny to black people." A spokesperson for Cadbury insisted that the campaign was "a light-hearted take on the social pretensions of Cadbury Dairy Milk Bliss". He added later, however, that the campaign was "no longer in circulation ... we have no plans to repeat the campaign."

VIDEO: Plumber Cat

VIDEO: This Had to Hurt

If These People Were Jewish, This is What Their Mothers Would Say

MONA LISA'S JEWISH MOTHER:

"This you call a smile, after all the money your father and I spent on 

braces?"

CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS' JEWISH MOTHER:

"I don't care what you've discovered, you still should have written!"

MICHELANGELO'S JEWISH MOTHER:

"Why can't you paint on walls like other children? Do you know how hard 

it is to get this junk off the ceiling?"

NAPOLEON'S JEWISH MOTHER:

"All right, if you're not hiding your report card inside your jacket, 

take your hand out of there and show me!"

ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S JEWISH MOTHER:

"Again with the hat! Why can't you wear a baseball cap like the other 

kids?"

GEORGE WASHINGTON'S JEWISH MOTHER:

"Next time I catch you throwing money across the Potomac, you can kiss 

your allowance good-bye!"

THOMAS EDISON'S JEWISH MOTHER:

"Of course I'm proud that you invented the electric light bulb. Now 

turn it off and go to sleep!"

PAUL REVERE'S JEWISH MOTHER:

"I don't care where you think you have to go, young man,midnight is long 

past your curfew!"

And then these two, who really did have Jewish mothers:

ALBERT EINSTEIN'S JEWISH MOTHER:

"But it's your senior photograph! Couldn't you have done something 

about your hair?"

MOSES' JEWISH MOTHER:

"That's a good story! Now tell me where you've really been for the last 

forty years."

 

Chinese prisoners forced to play World of Warcraft to make money for guards

It's a common practice for Chinese labor camps to force prisoners to bust boulders and dig ditches, but a former inmate has recently come forward to shed some light on a little-known practice that goes on behind the scenes: virtual labor. Liu Dali spent three years in one such labor camp, and claims that after a hard day's work was completed, he and up to 300 of his fellow detainees were forced to make virtual money in online games like World of Warcraft, for the benefit of prison guards.

The guards would then use the virtual cash for their own means, including trading it for real-world money. Dali claims he overheard guards bragging that they could make close to $1,000 a day off of the efforts of the inmates, none of which ever made its way into the hands of the workers. He also claims that certain quotas were set, and that those who didn't raise enough virtual cash would be physically beaten.

Raising large amounts of credit in online games through the use of multiple accounts and individuals is known as "gold farming." The practice is typically frowned upon due to the nature of the work and the fact that those involved are usually paid very little. The problem is especially widespread in China, where the government was forced to ban the practice in 2009, though it continues to be an issue to this day. Chinese officials have denied the allegations, and insist that because playing an online game would constitute "contact with the outside world," prisoners would never be allowed to engage in such activity.

Girl Shoots Dad with Arrow For Taking Away Her Cellphone

A 15-YEAR-OLD Washington girl angered when her father took away her mobile phone shot him in the torso with a hunting bow and arrow, then refused to let him use the phone to call for help.

The unidentified 35-year-old man, who crawled to a neighbor's home to phone 911, was flown to a hospital in a serious condition, KOMO-TV in Seattle reported overnight.

The girl, armed with the bow and at least 35 arrows, fled into a nearby woods following the incident yesterday, but was later taken into custody by a SWAT team.

After she was apprehended, the girl was found to be despondent with a serious medical issue, KOMO said, citing a sheriff's spokesman.

The father took away the mobile phone as a disciplinary measure, the spokesman said.

Tahuya is about 40km southwest of Seattle.

VIDEO: Rock the Boogie

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VIDEO: Dog is a Shopaholic

Isn't He Lovely?

VIP: Very Important Penguin

GOT CAPTION? 5/29 v. 2.0

VIDEO: Dog Run Over By Deer..Doh !

VIDEO: Hot Dog Anyone?

JOKE: Play Ball

Barack and Michelle are at the White Sox game.

Sitting in the first row with the Secret Service people directly behind them, one of

The Secret Service guys leans forward and says something to the president. Barack stares at the guy, looks at Michelle, looks back at the agent, and shakes his head violently.

The agent then says, "Mr. President, it was a unanimous request, from the owner of the team down to the bat boy. And...the fans would love it!"

So, Barack shrugs his shoulders and says, "If that's what the people want."

He gets up, grabs Michelle by her collar and the seat of her pants, and drops her right over the wall into the field. She gets up kicking, swearing, and screaming -- and the crowd goes wild, cheering, applauding, and high-fiving.

Barack is bowing and smiling, and leans over to the agent and says, "You were right, I would have never believed that!"

Then noticing the agent has gone totally pale, Barack asks what is wrong.

The agent replies, "Sir, I said, they want you to throw out the first PITCH!"

ty Larry

GOT CAPTION? 6/05

GOT CAPTION? 5/30

GOT CAPTION? 5/29

Video: This is just INSANE !!!

VIDEO: Incredible Surfing Action

VIDEO: BALL BALANCING BUDGIE

VIDEO: Baby having a bath with the cat

VIDEO: Now this is how to get into a car!

PRANK: Good Night Mattress

Washing machine a casualty of in home target shooting

ST. LUCIE COUNTY, Fla. - Officials are investigating a weekend incident in which a woman apparently fired an AR-15 rifle at a target inside her future ex-husband's master bedroom closet, missing the target and blasting holes in a washing machine.

When deputies on Sunday entered the home in the 5700 block of Spanish River Road, they found "a lot of water on the floor covering most of the residence," according to recently released St. Lucie County Sheriff's Office records.

The 21-year-old woman said she and her husband are divorcing. She said her 33-year-old spouse called on Saturday, asking whether they could "get together."

They had a "good evening," but started arguing on Sunday about reconciling. She said she told her husband she didn't want to get back together because she has a new boyfriend. She said her husband "went crazy" and started shooting indoors.

She said he was firing close to her and thought he was trying to scare her. She said blood on her legs came from "the bullets hitting the washing machine and the metal shards hitting her."

The woman, however, said she also was shooting with her husband.

Asked to write a sworn statement, she said, "I'll try my best but I'm drunk."

Investigators found .223 caliber and .45 caliber cartridge casings in the master bedroom and a wood and metal shooting target in the closet. Bullet holes riddled the washing machine, and bullet exit holes were spotted in the wall across from the washing machine.

A deputy learned they'd been in the bedroom shooting the target in the closet.

"They had done this on multiple occasions," a report states, noting both had been drinking.

The husband said he was cooking on the grill outside. His wife was inside, and he ran in when he heard shots.

"According to (the husband), once inside he observed water all over the floor and learned (his wife) had shot the AR-15 assault rifle, missing the target, going through the wall and striking the washing machine causing the water leak," a report states.

That, he said, is when he started arguing with his wife and told her to get out.

He said metal shards struck his wife while she shot the AR-15 alone.

It could be argued that firing a rifle within the confines of a bedroom is unwise.

One neighbor said he and his wife heard loud music coming from the home, but said that wasn't unusual. He said he heard five to six "'pops that sounded like gun shots in rapid succession,'" but suspected they were fireworks.

About 10 minutes later, the neighbor said, he saw the husband grilling in the driveway. The neighbor noted four to five more shots coming from in the house as the husband grilled. The husband raced inside and deputies soon showed up, apparently after the wife dialed 911.

As deputies watched the husband, he said, "About the arguing, she just grabbed the gun from the safe and started shooting and punching holes in the walls. The house then flooded so I went inside to clean it up."

Investigators spoke to a prosecutor and determined no charges would be filed at the time. The husband's three guns were taken from a safe and put into evidence for safekeeping.

The wife walked away, saying a ride was going to pick her up.

"Both parties were advised to stay away from each other," the report states.

It wasn't immediately clear what the husband was grilling.

Prison "computer error" lets 450 violent California felons walk free

According to California prison inspectors, an ill-equipped computer system has allowed the release of 450 inmates who are considered to have a "high risk of violence." The mistake originated in a computer program designed to organize the release of low-risk prisoners parole-free, and keep the facilities from wasting time and taxpayer dollars on those who pose no threat to society.

Unfortunately the criteria the system was using when it determined the release dates for 10,134 inmates last year failed to take into account convictions and disciplinary actions for over half of the state's entire prison population. Using only arrest information, which on paper can make even the most violent criminal appear to be a minimal threat to society, the system ordered the parole-free release of violent felons, gang members, and rapists.

Prisons in the state are dangerously overcrowded, and a federal mandate has given officials 2 years to cut the inmate population by 33,000 individuals. The computer program at fault was meant to help with this process, but without accurate records, it won't do much good. Law enforcement has made no attempt to track down the erroneously freed felons at this time, and officials say that they can only be returned if they are caught committing a crime.

JOKE: Two young rednecks were looking at a Sears catalog

Two young rednecks were looking at a Sears catalog and admiring the models.One says to the other, "Have you seen the beautiful girls in this catalog?"

The second one replies, "Yes, they are very beautiful. And look at the price!"

The first one says, with wide eyes, "Wow, they aren't very expensive. At this price, I'm buying one."

The second one smiles and pats him on the back. "Good idea! Order one and if she's as beautiful as she is in the catalog, I will get one too."

Three weeks later, the young man asks his friend, "Did you ever receive the girl you ordered from the Sears catalog?"

The second man replies, "No, but it shouldn't be long now. I got her clothes yesterday!"

GOT CAPTION? 5/28

NASCAR Driver Apologizes For Speeding..128 mph in a 45 mph zone

CONCORD, N.C. -- Kyle Busch apologized repeatedly Thursday for showing a "lack of judgment" in driving 128 mph in a 45 mph zone in a borrowed Lexus.

Busch was cited for careless and reckless driving, and speeding following a Tuesday stop. He was driving a nearly $400,000 bright yellow Lexus.

In his scheduled media session at Charlotte Motor Speedway, Busch apologized several times for the joyride and said he would not make the mistake again.

"I'm certainly sorry that it happened," he said. "All I can do is apologize to the public, my friends, my fans and my sponsors. I'll look at this experience as a learning experience and move forward."

The citation shows that Busch allegedly told the officer who stopped him the Lexus was "just a toy," but seemed to realize the flippancy of that remark Thursday.

"It wasn't a toy, it's a high performance vehicle," Busch said. "It should be driven with caution. Obviously I didn't have caution and I had a lack of judgment.

"There's probably reason why on the TV commercials that they always show at the bottom, 'Professional driver, closed course.' Mine was not that. Again, I apologize sincerely. All I can do is make sure it doesn't happen again."

Lexus parent company Toyota sponsors the Joe Gibbs Racing team that Busch drives for, and the 2012 Lexus LFA was loaned to both Busch and Denny Hamlin this week. Hamlin tweeted a picture of the car the day before Busch was ticketed with the post, "If u see me today in ur rear view driving this Please move!!"

"That car is absolutely amazing. The best driving machine I've ever been in," said Hamlin, who hopes to have the one he ordered by March. "Obviously it's hard to keep the speed out of it."

So how fast did Hamlin go?

"Most I went is about 10 over," he smiled. "The transmission shifted well, I can tell you that. I got up to speed fast."

The LFA is hand-built in Japan, and only 87 of the 500 scheduled vehicles have been built.

Of the 87 completed, only 20 are in the United States and all are privately owned. Lexus has two cars available as demos, and Busch was driving one of them. The cars are usually made available to potential buyers at test tracks on weekends, but that did not accommodate Busch and Hamlin's schedules so one was made available to them, said Lexus spokesperson Nancy Hubbell.

More on Kyle Busch

Related links

Drivers comment on Busch speeding ticket

Residents where Busch sped outraged

"He returned the car, nobody got hurt and for that we're grateful," Hubbell said. "We know that he is definitely remorseful. He's owned up to it, and we appreciate that. I think people recognize that this was an issue that the car didn't go fast all by itself, and the driver was testing its capabilities."

NASCAR team owner Joe Gibbs found no amusement in Busch's adventure.

"It's a serious issue, that's an important statement for us, this is serious," Gibbs said, declining to say if Busch will be punished but acknowledging the driver won't be suspended.

Because NASCAR does not require competitors to have a valid driver's license, the sanctioning body said it would not be disciplining Busch. According to information from the N.C. Department of Motor Vehicles, a conviction could cost Busch his driver's license for 60 days.

There was mixed reaction in the garage area Thursday about Busch's infraction.

"I've probably been guilty of the same thing myself, just didn't get caught," said Dale Earnhardt Jr., who then backed off ever driving 128 mph on a public road.

"I don't really know if I got that fast. I didn't know we had enough straight road in North Carolina to get going that quick. Apparently there's a piece somewhere."

Five-time defending champion Jimmie Johnson was also sympathetic to Busch. While not condoning the speed, Johnson said high performance vehicles are built for drivers who "stand on the gas."

"We as drivers aren't necessarily wired the same," he said. "It's tempting, especially when we have the skill sets that we do as drivers and you get a high performance car and you just want to see how it stacks up. I guess everybody that has a high performance car stands on the throttle at some point.

"I'm not trying to justify what he did, but we can all look at ourselves in the mirror and know that we've wondered what it felt like to stand on the gas pedal."

But Kevin Harvick, who has been openly feuding with Busch of late, was not as forgiving.

"I think some people are their own worst enemy when it comes to being responsible as a person or as a businessperson or anything that comes with life's responsibilities," said Harvick, who added he tends to go under the speed limit and hasn't driven irresponsibly in a street car since he was 16.

Gibbs seemed dismayed that all the progress Busch has made off the track has been overshadowed by the speeding ticket. Busch, winner of two races this season, is ranked third in the Sprint Cup standings heading into Sunday's Coca-Cola 600 in what's yet another strong season for the 26-year-old.

But much of the spotlight has been in the maturity he's shown this year in dealing with adversity. That hadn't changed Thursday, as Busch answered all the questions asked of him, but he stayed on message with buzz words such as "apologize," "lack of judgment," and "learning experience."

"The way he's handled things for that last year, I kind of felt like he's really made a great effort," Gibbs said. "Having said that, I'm hoping that somehow out of this, something positive will come out of it. In other words, it may be there are different organizations that reach out to young people driving, reckless driving.

"For me and for all of us at Joe Gibbs, Racing, I'm hoping there's something that maybe I can do going forward to make it, hopefully, something positive."

Hamlin believed Busch's past transgressions have fueled the attention on the speeding ticket.

"I believe it is more overhyped because it is Kyle," he said. "I truly believe if it's someone that's not as big in our sport, it's not this big of an issue. I just think who it was ... has more to do with it.

"Kyle is a skilled driver, he knows the limits of his race cars and his street cars. That's no excuse, by any means, but why it's a big deal."

VIDEO: Dog with two broken legs finds owner after storm

A scruffy Alabama terrier mix named Mason was whisked away by fierce twisters last month, prompting his owners, who lost their home in the storm, to fear the worst. But the redoubtable mutt apparently crawled back to his home days later with two broken legs in a remarkable tale of survival.

Mason was blown away by the storm from the garage in Birmingham where he was hiding on April 27. His owners looked for him everywhere but couldn't find him. Two and a half weeks later, though, they found Mason waiting for them on their front porch when they returned to the house to look through the debris.

Workers at the Birmingham Jefferson County Animal Control shelter are now caring for Mason, since his owners say they can't take care of him while they piece their lives back together after the storm. "This is probably the most dramatic we've seen as far as an injury in an animal that's survived this long. It's kind of tapering off, the amount of animals we're seeing because of the storm. For an animal just to show up on someone's porch after this time was pretty remarkable, especially with the condition he's in," shelter worker Phil Doster told the news station.

Mason is "doing fantasic" after his May 20 surgery where metal plates were attached to his bones so they could heal, Doster told The Lookout in an email. "We are excited that he will be going back to his family and to the home where he finally returned after 3 weeks," he wrote. Mason is expected to be able to walk completely normally after he recovers in about six weeks, though his front legs will be a bit shorter than his back legs. Mason's family has requested to not be named in the media, Doster added, but they are "very excited" for Mason to come home when their house is again habitable in about five weeks.

Pets are often forgotten victims of natural disasters such as the fierce storms and tornadoes that have battered the Midwest the past few months. The Human Society of the United States has sent rescue teams to find pets in Joplin, Missouri, Tuscaloosa, Alabama, and other hard-hit areas.

Wisconsin woman lands on roof of garage after she's ejected in car crash

A 23-year-old Manitowoc woman was transported to Aurora Medical Center shortly after 8 p.m. Monday when she lost control of her vehicle, which rolled over several times before landing in the front yard of a residence.

Two Rivers Police Department Lt. Shawn Engleman said officers were called to the 3600 block of Memorial Drive after receiving a report of a northbound vehicle swerving in and out of traffic at high speed.

Witnesses said the vehicle hit the median and went airborne, crossing the southbound lane and then rolling four times before landing in the front yard of a residence.

The woman was ejected and landed on the garage roof of the residence, according to Engleman.

The driver then tried to walk away from the scene.

Two Rivers Fire Department paramedics transported her to the hospital with non-life threatening injuries. The accident is still under investigation.

Alcohol was a factor in the accident, Engleman said.

JOKE: A hitchhiker is standing on the roadside

A hitchhiker is standing on the roadside near the law school with his thumb out. A motorist stops, and asks, "Are you a lawyer?" He tells him that he is not. The motorist drives off. A second motorist stops and asks, "Are you a lawyer?" He again replies that he is not. The motorist drives off. A third motorist, this time a striking, voluptuous blonde, stops, and asks, "Are you a lawyer?" The hitchhiker says that he is. The girl tells him to get in, and off they go. After a few minutes of admiring the driver, the hitchhiker exclaims, "This is really something. I've only been a lawyer for five minutes, and already I'm thinking about screwing somebody!"

GOT CAPTION? 5/27

VIDEO: Man Fights Cop, Steals The Cruiser And Crashes Into Truck

Man Fights Cop, Steals The Cruiser And Crashes Into Truck

VIDEO: Engineer Spends 15-Years, 20,000 Hours Building 1:3 Scale Ferrari 312PB

Consider creating a 1/3 scale model car from scratch; consider working 40 hr. weeks for ten years on your model.You photograph every single part and then you sketch the parts. You then create every single part by hand since this is a unique minature and there are no parts to requisition or purchase. This is what Pierre Scerri did. He created molds. He machined every part by hand where the difference in 1/1000 of an inch is so critical that the engine might not even work.

This meticulous labor of love was a dream of his to own the Ferrari that he could never afford. He fell in love with the sound of a 12 cylinder Ferrari engine and thus began his quest to create and own his very own Ferrari.

Pierre Scerri is a French telecommunications engineer and model builder, who gained fame in 1998 after having his highly accurate 1:3 scale model of a Ferrari 312 PB featured on the BBC programme Jeremy Clarkson's Extreme Machines.

He began his project for the model in 1978, out of desire for having a Ferrari that could function in his dining room . Pierre Bardinon, owner of the Mas du Clos race track, allowed Scerri to take detailed photographs of the actual car on display at the adjacent Ferrari museum. Based on those photographs, he drafted the schematics and made the molds for all parts of the model, a process which took 15 years.

In 1989, he finally completed assembly of the engine, a perfect scaled replica of the Flat-12 cylinder engine found on the 312PB. He reportedly took extra time tuning the engine so that it would sound like the full-scale model. The project was finally completed in December 1992.

Scerri is now working on 3 new models, a Ferrari 330 P4, another Ferrari 312PB and an engine for a Ferrari 250 GTO, all 1:3 scale.

VIDEO: How close to a train track can you set up a vegetable market?

Maeklong Market Thailand

Dog honored for helping save owner's life

Dog honored for helping save owner's lifeLassie has nothing on Yogi, a golden retriever credited with saving his owner's life after a serious cycling accident near Lake Travis, Texas. On Tuesday, the Humane Society of the United States recognized Yogi as the 2011 Valor Dog of the Year for leading neighbors to where Paul Horton lay paralyzed after flipping off his mountain bike. 58-year-old Horton had taken Yogi along last October as he rode trails near his home on a hill not far from Windy Point. As Horton jumped a kerb on his bike, disaster struck. "I'm sure I've done it 100 times, but this time my front wheel stopped, and I went over the handlebars and landed on my head," Horton said. He wasn't wearing a helmet, but doctors told him that probably wouldn't have prevented his spinal injuries. Horton was knocked unconscious. When he woke up, he couldn't move and was bleeding from the nose and mouth. Yogi was at his side. For the next 45 minutes, Horton pleaded with the 85-pound dog to go home and get help. Yogi didn't want to leave. Horton couldn't yell, and he was out of sight of passers-by, about 100 feet from a dead-end street. Finally, Yogi headed back to the main road, where Horton's neighbors Bruce and Maggie Tate were walking. The normally mellow dog barked frantically. The Tates knew something was wrong and followed Yogi to Horton. There, Yogi stood protectively by his friend. "It's pretty amazing that Yogi first stayed with Paul when he needed to, then recognized us and came to get us," Bruce Tate said. "Paul was in desperate shape. He wasn't in a place where there's a lot of traffic." Horton was transported to St. David's Round Rock Medical Center, where doctors determined that his vertebrae had shifted, pinching his spinal cord and paralyzing him from the chest down. They operated to relieve pressure and stabilize his spine. Horton spent four nights there, then moved to St. David's Rehabilitation Hospital, where he stayed for two months. His wife, Shearon, brought Yogi to visit several times. "The dog alerting his neighbor was instrumental in getting him to a hospital and preventing his choking to death or going into shock," said Dr. Juan LaTorre. "He might not have survived if he hadn't been found until the next day." "It takes a very unique and special dog to do what Yogi did," said Nicole Paquette, Texas senior state director of the Humane Society. "He obviously has a true bond with Paul, and it just demonstrates how close we are to our companion animals and how much we need them." Yogi, Horton said, acts differently since the accident. "He stays within sight of me in the house. If I change rooms, he changes rooms. If I move over five feet, he moves over five feet," he said. Horton remains paralyzed but has regained some sensation in his abdomen, legs and back. He has limited use of his arms and hands. He's also learned that he has arthritis and leukemia.
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JOKE: Tiger Woods drove his new Cadillac Escalade into an Irish gas station

"Taking a wee break from the golf circuit, Tiger Woods drove his new Cadillac Escalade into an Irish gas station. An attendant greeted him in typical Irish manner, unaware who the golf pro was.

"Top of the mornin' to ya!" the Irishman smiled, doffing his cap.

As Tiger got out of the mammoth vehicle, two tees fell out of his pocket.

"Say, what are those, lad," asked the attendant?

"They're called tees," replied Tiger.

"And what would ya be usin' 'em for, now," inquired the Irishman?

"Well, they're for resting my balls on when I drive," said Tiger.

"AW! Jaysus, Mary an' Joseph," exclaimed the Irish attendant. "Those fellas at Cadillac think of everything!"

GOT CAPTION? 5/26

VIDEO: Classic Prank

Casino Has Flea Problem..Refuses to Shut Down to Fumigate

New Zealand casino staff forced to wear flea collars

Workers at the SkyCity casino in Auckland are having to spray themselves with insect repellent and wear flea collars to keep from being bitten on the job. Employees have complained about infestations on the casino floor for years and, despite the carpet and areas around gaming machines being cleaned regularly, the problem has persisted.

Unite Union national director Mike Treen said workers had been complaining to SkyCity management, as well as the union, for years. He knew of a number of workers who attached flea collars to their ankles to stop being bitten.

"Some of them have them on to try and prevent being bitten. Some people react quite badly - [they] get really bad spots and it can affect their health and then result in time off. It's definitely a health and safety issue." Mr Treen said workers were also provided with cans of flea repellent - if they wanted them - so they could spray themselves before starting work.

The union said part of the ongoing problem was that casino management were unwilling to shut the floor down for a day because they would lose too much money. "It's just about 24-hour, seven-day business," Mr Treen said. SkyCity said that the casino floors were cleaned every day.

VIDEO: Boy Rescued After Being Stuck Between Two Brick Buildings

VIDEO: Neddy the Dog is a Gymnast

VIDEO: MUSIC WITH 1000 PAIRS OF JEANS

TODAY I FOUND OUT

Source: Today I found out

The world's worst hunting dog?

A bumbling beagle has been branded the world's worst hunting dog after failing to spot a fox trotting along behind him.

The hapless hound had strayed too close to a den containing four cute fox cubs.

But their protective parents were not going to be hounded out without standing their ground.

The foxes shot off through the undergrowth to confront the hound, but, amazingly, the male fox ended up behind the dog.

Naturalist and photographer Mircea Costina captured the amazing scene in a forest north of Montreal, Canada.

He said: "I have been watching this one fox family for three years since 2008. This year they had four little pups and the two parents are very protective.

"This one day, around 7am, I was close to their den, trying to take some pictures. Suddenly the two parents became very agitated.

"In the next moments I heard a dog barking. The male looked to try and see the intruder while the female attempted to pursue him.

"The dog was getting very close to the den when the male saw the hound and started tracking it.

"Luckily the dog gave up and finally left and the family remained safe. I think he was more interested in the game of smelling the fox trace. The master recovered the dog and put him on a leash.

"It was the first time in my life when I saw foxes so brave and who managed to fight back against a hunting dog to defend their pups with their life. An unforgettable story!"

JOKE: Sex At The Nursing Home..........

Harold is 95 and lives in a Senior Citizen Home.

Every night after dinner, Harold goes to a secluded garden

behind the Center to sit and ponder his accomplishments and

long life.

One evening, Mildred, age 87, wanders into the garden. They

begin to chat and before they know it, several hours have

passed.

After a short lull in their conversation, Harold turns to

Mildred and asks, 'Do you know what I miss most of all?'

She asks, 'What?'

'Sex!!' he replies

Mildred exclaims, 'Why you old fart. You couldn't get it up

if I held a gun to your head!'

'I know,' Harold says, 'but it would be nice if a woman

could just hold it for a while.'

Well, I can oblige,' says Mildred, who unzips his trousers,

removes his manhood and proceeds to hold it. Afterward, they agree to

meet secretly each night in the garden where they would sit and talk and

Mildred would hold Harold's manhood.

Then one night Harold didn't show up at their usual meeting

place. Alarmed, Mildred decided to find Harold and make sure he was

O.K.

She walked around the Senior Citizen Home where she found

him sitting by the pool with Ethel, another female resident,

who was holding Harold's manhood!

Furious, Mildred yelled, 'You two-timing son of a bitch!

What does Ethel have that I don't have?'

Old Harold smiled happily and replied, 'Parkinson's.'

GOT CAPTION? 5/25

VIDEO: this cop is an ass

Joshua Monson's Lawyers Keep Getting Stabbing Pains

We're not sure if stabbing lawyers should be considered a crime -- or merely a thoughtful act of community service. But it seems the barristers of Everett, Washington are getting a little tired of being attacked by 27-year-old accused killer Joshua Monson...

He's charged with the January shooting death of Brian Jones. Now he's having a little difficulty maintaining his courtroom decorum.

Tom Cox was his first lawyer. But Monson apparently wasn't happy with his professional skills. So he snuck a pencil out of jail and stabbed Cox in the neck while they were in court.

Cox wasn't seriously hurt, but he decided to resign from the case, making it the first incident in legal history where a lawyer has turned down billable hours.

So Monson was assigned a second lawyer, Gurjit Pandher. But once again, he decided to stab him with a pencil too. Pandher wasn't hurt -- it seems Monson is way better at shooting than he is at stabbing. But Pandher also resigned from the case.

Now, to make sure someone will defend Monson in court, a judge has decided to have his arms strapped to a chair whenever he appears. He'll also undergo a medical examination to see if he's crazy -- or if he's just a Good Samaritan trying to rid the world of a plague.

Sheep and goats act as guides for blind horse

Michelle Feldstein was prepared to provide special accommodations for the blind horse she recently added to the flightless ducks, clawless cats and homeless llamas inhabiting her animal shelter in Montana. But nothing could prepare her for the 40-legged, seeing-eye entourage that accompanied "Sissy," a sightless, 15-year-old quarter horse.

"Sissy came with five goats and five sheep - and they take care of her," said Feldstein, the force behind Deer Haven Ranch, a private rescue facility she runs with her husband, Al, on 300 acres north of Yellowstone National Park. The seeing-eye sheep and guard goats are never far from the white mare, and they never lead her astray. They shepherd Sissy to food and water, and angle the horse into her stall amid blowing snows or driving rains.

"They round her up at feeding time and then move aside to make sure she gets to the hay," Feldstein said. "They show her where the water is and stand between her and the fence to let her know the fence is there." The animals might have been marked for death had Feldstein not intervened when another rescue facility in western Montana folded this winter. "I only take animals that others consider throwaways," said Feldstein, 66.

Feldstein and her husband, a retired editor of Mad Magazine, underwrite their rescue operation. It can cost as much as $50,000 a year for feed, veterinarian services, and winter-time heating of barns and water troughs for a total of 200 animals. The couple also run a guest house for humans whose profits are poured into the animal sanctuary. Feldstein said she marvels at the blind mare and her barnyard attendants. "There's a magic involved in sheep, goats and a horse becoming best friends," she said. "When you watch them, you have to wonder, why can't people do that?"

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